I think in the back of my mind I know the minute I sit down at a desk I'm done. I won't try this again.
I thought about volunteering when I can and studying for the MCAT on evenings and weekend and possibly applying next cycle. But the further I get away from it the harder it is to return.
I spent about an hour yesterday looking at income over the next 5 -9 years @ former salary and modest annual increases compared to cost off attendece ( tuition + COL) at a moderatly priced med school, + interest on existing loans.
I would leave residency (3-4yr) with around 800,000$ in lost income and 370,000$ in loans. Now assuming I go into an modest on/gym average @ 150,000 (- tax & insurance ) it wouldn't be difficult to bring that loan number down in 10-15 years with a modest living.
And the 370,000 amount is with 40,000 for school and 20, 000 for living expenses (avg 9$ per hour for a 40 hr work week) So as I sit here and stress about a 15$ hour a job how am I going to get through 4 years of less? On top of the pressure to get my work in, get extra curriculars in and so forth. If I had no children, or even a younger child or a significant other I would not let these numbers phase me.
But after the last 6 months of these financial struggles and seeing the potential my little one has at her school and in her craft.
I am bowing out. Maybe I will return one day. Who knows.
Who knows I may hit the lottery tomorrow or get 2 million dollars from a long lost uncle.
But for now this is goodbye.
Thank you to anyone who has supported me, encouraged me, stood by me, or just said hi to me.
May God Bless whatever you have going on on your life and may you reach your ultimate goal.
****these numbers are VERY Loose based off a rudimentary estimate of a personal look at MY situation*****
Say it aint so! But seriously, whatever decision you make is the best one for you. Best of luck with your future endeavors. And, if you wake up tomorrow and have a change of heart life will go on and there are those of us on the interweb who are still rooting for you to be successful in whatever you chose to pursue!!!
ReplyDeleteGod Bless!
-Andie
Thank You Andie...
ReplyDeleteand the feeling of a change of heart did not even wait till the morning. I still want to call the scribe lady back and ask her have they filled the position. I don't want to go back to where I was. :(
A great friend of mine I was talking with mentioned maybe the opportunity for the scribe job was just get me off track of my plan to return to work and provide more resources for my daughter...
But as i look more at the jobs, and the work environments I am trying to return to ( trying being the key word). I kind of wonder are the lure of a "easier" life at the expense of work satisfaction the true detourant in this scenario? But even if it is. What does that change anything?
Ugh... I feel so silly for being right back here after supposedly making up my mind.
Anywho.... The point of my reply was to say thank you for your kind words.
I wish you the best also.
:)