Rough Day(s)

Just feeling a bit defeated today.

Work
 My shift was not as smooth as I would have liked.  I worked with a new doc of course, and I just could not get on track with their flow.   We also had a lot of high level patients so that's always a bit of a challenge.  I just feel like sometimes its just hard to get that communication line open.  I am toe sensitive, I need to be more assertive, but I want to not irritate or offend.   Ugghhh... I don't know... just a ruff day.  Also these multiple overnight shifts are really throwing off my game.  I end up sleeping most of the day, and not really being productive.  I just started laundry at 5:13 am, so I can make sure Jordyn's uniform tops are dry by tomorrow night for me to iron them..

School
Summer and Fall schedule of classes  is finally out,  looks like I am going to try and get into Biostatistics and Evolution for the summer.
For fall Immunology, Biochemistry, Genomics, and Brain and Behavior.

I am going to be basically taking all science courses, for the rest of the plan. It is going to be a lot of work , to maintain A's in the courses, especially with the scribe job.  I am going to have to Kill it, which is also why I need to get this MCAT finished.


The Plan
I don't know here, I may need to re-evaluate what needs to happen.  I am concerned about the age of my pre-reqs when I apply.  I need to order another MSAR ( Medical School Admissions Requirements) book to check the latest age limits on pre-reqs.  I thought it was 7, but a doc mentioned today it was 5. I may end up having to take them all over again, which would REALLY REALLY suck.  If I do I am going for a formal post-back.

Also emailed a Pre-med consultant, and she was not very optimistic.  But I am not going to turn around now based on that.   I will still go full force with another attempt.  I just need to make sure I make all the right steps.

Officially starting my Mcat program Monday.

I am feeling kind of stressed

My rugrat
She got accepted into the fine arts school she auditioned for.
I am trying to get her into a Joffrey dance intensive they are having close to us, but we missed all the in-person auditions and a video audition is due on April 1st.   Have a few emails out, but no one is available till next weekend which leaves only a week to get the routine recorded and submitted.   I am thinking about just saying never mind but I think she could learn a lot. Also I would like to get her into something while I still have a little savings left.  

life..
just a bit stressed out. Things are already bumpy and I have only been at it a month or two.  I don't feel like quitting.  I just feel unjustified for my actions.  

Especially when others ask am I loving my new job, and how things are going.  I want to say awesome, great positive things.  But in reality its ruff.  The new job is still a challenge, I have not started classes, and I don't know that what I have planned there is the best course of action.  And since I decided not to cash out the full 401K I am concerned about my finances.  I am not working a lot of hours at the new job, and I have looked at a few professional part time jobs, that will have a higher salary, but they require a more steady schedule.  Its a bit of a challenge to get a steady schedule with the scribing, and I will be starting classes in the summer that will definitely impact my availability, and I still have Jordyn to take care of.

Like I said.. just not feeling accomplished right now, more challenges than victories right now.


I'm not giving up.  I WILL survive.  This is only the bottom of the mountain, I still have some more hills to climb.   I WILL MAKE IT, I will look back on these days and be like... Girl you thought it was ruff then.. LOL..